I am a Black woman and I want to adopt?

Question by lgdubya: I am a Black woman and I want to adopt?
I would really like to adopt (in the not so near future) a Caucasian child, an Asian and an African child. Money is no factor.

However, I was reading this article: http://www.newsweek.com/id/194886 and it pointed out some concerns which I already fathomed would happen and what friends and family have told me.

Why is it okay or more acceptable for a White family to adopt a Black (or Asian) child and it is looked upon as “Oh they are giving the little Black (or Asian) baby a better chance.”? Whereas if a Black family adopts a White (or Asian) child, it is looked upon as “I wonder if they kidnapped that child.”?

Is there anyone who has different race parents or has adopted a child of a different race? What has your experience been with strangers?
I have already pictured in my mind what I want my family to look like. I want an multi racial and diverse family and don’t see why I can only have one choice of a Black child. If I have my own child, they will be Black. I can’t possibly have an Asian or White child. Even if they are biracial, they are still considered Black in this American society.

Similar to people choosing if they want a little girl or boy, I want an Asian (girl) and White (boy) child.
Happy to be: You totally proved my point! Thank you!
Did any of you notice that none of the answerers have a problem with me adopting an African child? But some clearly have a problem with me adopting an Asian or White child. Just thought I’d point that out.

Just like an adopter would want to adopt a little girl because that’s what they have pictured in their mind, why would it be wrong if an adopter has a specific race in mind?
Thanks for the answers and your opinions, whether negative or positive. This question was really to get feedback from individuals who possibly were adopted into a different race family or vice versa. As I wanted to hear what others have experienced.

I’m obviously not ready to adopt as I’ve stated in the question that I want to adopt in the not so near future. And, of course, there’s so much more research that I intend to do before adoption.

But how can I learn when no one is willing to teach?

Because I’m not adopting the race that society tells me to adopt.

In the end though, I am very sure life (and God) will have me meet someone who’s able and willing to help me and explain to me the negatives and positives of my future family.

Best answer:

Answer by Spotty-Dotty
It’s nobody else’s business.

But if you’re truly interested in adoption then you shouldn’t be fussy on the race of your child.

Give your answer to this question below!

Pacifica High School Adopt-a-Child 2012

It’s a tradition Pacifica High School Seniors look forward to, as Sophomores and Juniors, the opportunity to play Santa to hundreds of underprivileged kids, the holiday Adopt-a-Child Program. Garden Grove TV3 reporter Roma Villavicencio shows us all the fun.

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10 thoughts on “I am a Black woman and I want to adopt?”

  1. I think the fact that you want to adopt any child is wonderful.
    However, as you may know we live in a world that is so completely ignorant! I would adopt any child of any race as well.
    Friends of ours who are white have 4 children that are adopted and they are African American, and 2 bio white kids.
    After school one day their little boy said “Oh there is my sister” and pointed to her (she is white). The teacher said to him”she isn’t your sister!” He then said “Oh yes she is” and the teacher actually said “she is white your black!!” Our friends little boy told her “your blind”!
    That is what our friends are teaching their kids to say when someone says something like that. That the world is blind to love and family, and only see color!
    Good luck and I wish you much happiness!

  2. my mom is white and my dad is black and i have white brother and white sister and have black sister and brothers ad i also have mixed sisters and brother..and i have a adopt brother and he always had black parent so they really didn’t won’t my mom to adopt because she is white and they rather see him with a all black family

  3. oh, so you want like a fun bag mix of kids? would you like fries with that? Maybe a milkshake? Adoption is about whether YOU will be the right parent for the child, not whether the child fits the picture of what you want. Put the race card away.

  4. I think it is great that you want a multicultural family. I also think that a lot of emphasis is put on people adopting children of their own culture because of where people live with different color children and what they will endure in school and from other children and from people in the community. That is just what I gather from the world around me. I think you should do whatever you feel in your heart if you are sure they would not endure heart ache in your community and they would be accepted all around you. Of course they will in your home and with you but unfortunatley that is not the only place they will be in their life.

  5. Adoption is supply and demand. Unless you live in a predominantly white neighborhood, your chances of adopting either an Asian or Caucasian child is zero. Your chances of getting a biracial or black child is HIGH because of the availability. Adoption is about providing a child a home – not your social experiment needs.

  6. I am not a firm believer in adoption, of any kind, unless it is totally necessary for the child. As in the child, without a doubt, is a true orphan and/or has suffered from proven neglect and abuse.

    What I do find so totally intriguing about some of the answers here. There are actually people negatively answering you about wanting to adopt across racial and ethnic backgrounds. Why? Is it because you state you are Black? Because certainly, the greatest amount of pro-adoption people would never give these same answers to a White person who is wanting to adopt from Asia, Africa or even black children here in America. When whites adopt other races/ethnicities not the same as their’s, they are seen as Heroes, Saviors, Rescuers, even Saintly. But I guess when a financially well-off Black person says the same about adopting (even by sex of child), well! even nicely you are being told how the children of another race/ethnicity would be viewed in public, being raised by you…a Black person. Again..what do we have..DOUBLE STANDARDS! Is absolutely Wunnerful when a white person wants to adopt kids from other countries, races and ethnicities, but guess that doesn’t apply to Black people. And then someone actually has the nerve to tell you, that you are ‘playing the race card’!!!! Some people in this country, will only ever see White as Right, no matter that you want to adopt for the same reasons a lot of White people want to adopt….rescuing children from supposed bad circumstances, whether domestic or internationally. Many people who have adopted, have adopted the sex of child they preferred/desired, it’s done all the time, always has. I say What’s Good for the Goose is Good for the Gander! If White people can adopt black, asian, purple w/green polka dot children and allowed a gender preference….then certainly you should be allowed to do the same. Otherwise it is not you pulling the race card, but rather the entities/the people who tell you it is not feasible for you, as a black person and any child you *desire* to adopt.

    ETA: Momto2boyz “I think you should do whatever you feel in your heart if you are sure they would not endure heart ache in your community and they would be accepted all around you. Of course they will in your home and with you but unfortunatley that is not the only place they will be in their life.”
    Do you tell the same to white people who adopt black, bi-racial or Asian children and bring them into their all-white communities?

  7. I am concerned that your major criteria for adopting is RACE!

    There are so many more concerns than the color or ethnicity of a child.

    But really, Do I have to be the one to tell you that?

    You stated: “Just like an adopter would want to adopt a little girl because that’s what they have pictured in their mind, why would it be wrong if an adopter has a specific race in mind?”

    This is 2009 and there is ALOT wrong with that. I can see valid reasons for choosing gender (we only have one extra bedroom and there is a girl) etc. But chosing race?

    Look at it this way: Would you deny a child a good home because the “race” was wrong?
    I have a problem with you adopting any child (any race) because you are NOT doing it for the child. You are fulfilling your own needs which include what your family should LOOK LIKE and not who they are!

  8. I can’t stand ignorance. People should not make such a big deal about race. If they would stop and look at themselves, they would see they are multiracial anyway. America was built by many races, and they eventually blended. So I say go for it!!

    I am white, & in the process of adopting my foster daughter who is also white. We also have two Asian girls in our home that we hope to adopt. The youngest is Asian/white. We may also be able to adopt the baby sibling being born soon. It will also be Asian/white. When I had a black child in my home, people would say nasty things under their breath. Yet, if my husband was with me in public, with the child, we got the looks you were describing. “Oh look at them, with their little black girl” I hate that. Even now, my two youngest being Asian, I here comments like “Must be another Jon & Kate” I know my family is different, & I love that it is. Why be normal, right?

    If all people will ever see is the color of someones skin, or their ethnicity, then they will be missing out on a lot. Good luck too you. I hope you are successful in obtaining your family.

  9. I think its wonderful you want to adopt period. I think its even more wonderful that you want to adopt muti-races. When people look at other people anymore they just see color, which is ridiculous. I think its a great idea that you want different race children because, your showing not only your children, but other people that it don’t matter what race someone is, you can still love the for them and not what they look like. People are so racist and its ridiculous. I hope and pray you get the family you dream of. People really need to look at life like you do. It’s not about your race but how you treat others. And everyone should be treated with the same respect, it shouldn’t be judged by your race, or beliefs.

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